Now on to the pointlessness

I completely and totally forgot about Get Smart.

I remember my birthday, filled with hot, stifling air and surprise presents, and the greatest surprise of having had fun at the end of it all.

I remember standing in line at the movie theater, annoyed the movie was starting in 20 minutes and they hadn't let us in yet. I remember the chocolate peanut butter milkshake that tasted of unicorns and rainbows (though not literally, as we all know unicorns taste like chicken).

I remember leaving the movie theater and going to the store to pick up stuff for the bar-b-que at Stevie's house, watching GhostBusters while eating ribs, playing with Deuce, the wonder puppy, going home, sweating and grumpy because I didn't feel like watching the LOCI that had aired that night, and instead watched the end of GhostBusters, happy I had switched it on just as Venkman was saying, "So...She's a dog."

I remember every moment I have experienced since then, even the weird-ass dream I had last night wherein I was an immigrant and no one could understand me except this old black man.

But try as I might today, I couldn't remember the name of the movie I had seen that Sunday afternoon. I couldn't even remember who was in it, a scene from it, or the music. Any of those would have been clue enough. It wasn't until I went to the Alamo Drafthouse's website that I was able to remember what I had seen.

Which is, to me, a strong indicator of whether or not a movie impacted me at all.

Which has nothing whatsoever to do with whether or not a movie is good. Just memorable. I enjoyed Get Smart well enough for what it was while I was watching it, but it wasn't a memorable sort of enjoyment. There was no...resonance. The last time our air conditioning broke we saw Pirates III and I still remember how much I enjoyed myself.

Other movies I forgot I saw (until someone reminded me):

• Zodiac (forgot within minutes of walking out of the theater)
• Be Kind Rewind (remembered for about 2 days then forgot until the other day when I saw it out on DVD)
• Sweeney Todd (made myself forget)
• The Prestige (talked about it for about 2 hours, then forgot I saw it until someone brings it up)

And probably there are others that I've - you guessed it - forgotten.

I spend an unnatural amout of time watching godawful crap on the Sci-Fi channel and love every minute of it. I also enjoy summer blockbuster season. I love Very Serious Movies that are supposed to make us think, or see the world in a different light (though I'm getting quite tired of the earnest exploitative depravity of the latter, but that's a subject for another post). I love being entertained, and as long as I don't feel I've actually lost brain cells in the process of watching something (such as Old School), I consider any movie time well spent. But if I forget a movie existed, even after I've lost the hours I've invested in seeing it, well, it kind of pisses me off. Of course, I only get pissed off once I remember I'd forgotten, but still.

I think it's a very personal subject - movie tastes. No one really feels the need to criticize my book loves, or what TV shows I watch. But everyone seems to have an opinion on my opinions of movies. I too am quite opinionated about movies and am unafraid of express them, but I don't care whether or not others agree with me.

For example: The Departed? Most Overrated Movie of 2006. Not afraid to say it. Will not change my mind no matter how many people exclaim, "You crazy?!?" Don't care how brilliant you thought it was.

I also think the cult of Chuck Palaniuk needs to die (he's not that cutting edge talented), that The Da Vinci Code (the book) is moronic no matter how many people I respect tell me how enjoyable it is (if I want to not think, I will watch the Sci-Fi channel, thank you), and that Michael Crichton needs to. just. stop. I hate issues novels for teens and The Berenstain Bears because they're preachy as shit.

But most people don't care about all that. Well, some people would. But. Booklovers are generally more interested in sharing opinions - even differing ones - than convincing others how wrong they are for having opinions that don't match the consensus.

Movie lovers? Totally different breed. Kind of scary, actually. When I tell someone I hated The Unforgiven, I'm not saying I thought it was a bad movie. What I'm saying is, "This movie depressed the shit out of me, taught me nothing about the human condition I didn't already know, took itself way too seriously, and left me wanting to slit my wrists - the right way - at the end." Why would I love a movie like that? Why would someone else care so much that I hated it? Does my opinion invalidate yours? Are people really that insecure? Do I love asking stupid questions?

Yes I do. Gotta problem with that?